This is for Megan...So, the ER has it's good times and it's bad times, but it never disappoints in the entertainment division. I've hesitated on telling my ER stories for a few reasons. For one thing, there are too many ridiculous things that have happened in the ER this past year to try and compile together. Also, in the beginning, I found my work life a bit overwhelming, and was happy to leave it behind the second I left the hospital. I didn't like talking about work when I got home-- I was pretty good at compartmentalizing. Some days are harder than others, but it has definitely gotten more manageable over the year. More days than not, I come home thinking how cool my job is. But, with that being said, there is always an element of the ridiculous in my daily work life. This is not a sophisticated life. It's a life in which I have actually had to have a patient restrained and then put a facemask on him, so he will stop spitting at me. It's a life in which a 65 year old stinky female patient of mine yelled at me for taking too long to write a prescription for her "emergency" vaginal itching at 3:30 am while I was trying to save a patient who wasn't breathing (actual emergency). It's a life in which we joke about our "ER handshake" being a rectal exam (yeah, don't go to the ER and complain of severe abdominal pain...). But, it is pretty cool to do some of the things we get to do. I thought I would kick off the ER stories with a contest we recently started amongst our residents. Each month, we pool together the best triage complaints we've seen all month. No names are given, just the "chief complaint", the statement that explains why they have come to the ER (this, along with vital signs, is all we get when we pick up a chart to go see a patient). Some of the big contenders this month were:
1. "Someone put something in my weed"
2. "I'm drunk and I need a woman"
3. "I shit myself"
4. "I shouldn't be here"
5. "I was hit in the head by manequin legs that were thrown from a window"
6. "I had a dream I was having a heart attack, so I woke up and took Nitroglycerine, and now I have a headache" (a common reaction to Nitroglycerine)
Those were the big winners this month...we'll see what next month has to offer...
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4 comments:
i think my vote is for number 5. i appreciate the stories. i think about you every time i watch a doctor show (because i'm sure it's just like tv).
number 5 was my favorite too...i still laugh thinking about it
I think "I shouldn't be here" is funny and says something about that patients lack of brain cells. If you relize you shouldn't be there, just get up and leave knucklehead. I bet 100 dollars they got "the handshake".
I kind of like number 3. i mean this guy just doesn't care about the injury...he keeps his eye on the ball. you gotta respect that
ben
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